Fiance's mom found out I carry....

[blankexistance]

From the beginning:

This past saturday, I was at the SGL range with my friend. I was breaking in my SuperTuck (which is awesome, btw), and was shooting my BCM. Needless to say, it was hot, and as we were packing things into the car, I decided to take off my cover shirt. No big deal. My friend noticed a guy was staring us down. As I was pulling out of my parking spot, he walked out away from his car, totally getting a look at my plates. We both were like, "wtf is that guy all about? probably a bored off duty cop who doesn't know the law". So I just waved out the window at him while I drove off. That was that, nothing came of it.

Until the other day, when my fiance told me that I ignored her uncle at the range. I was like, "What, I didn't see your uncle at all!" and she was like, "Yeah, he was there with his son, and you just ignored him".

It hit me like a slap in the face. The "off duty cop" was her uncle, who is a probation officer. I laughed my ass off. I didn't recognize him one bit, so of course I ignored some weirdo just staring at me, and getting my plate numbers. He wasn't trying to say hi or wave or anything, just stared me down.

Well, I was talking to my lady today, and apparently her uncle was so very concerned that I had a "permit" that he called her mom to complain about it. Funny how Italian families work (no offense intended to anyone ). So her mom was all like, "Why does he need a permit?! You know how difficult it is to get one? You need very specific reasons to do so."

blah blah BAAAAA. Lol. I really wish they would have just come to me about the whole thing. That way I could set them all straight!

For the record, her uncle sometimes OC's around her grandma's house, which is right next door to her mom's house. He doesn't expect anyone to mind him doing that. I feel he thinks that us "ordinary people" shouldn't carry guns, but I have no idea, because I wasn't there when he made the comment to my lady.

We all know how easy it is to get a LTCF. I got mine in 3 days, lol, and I know others have gotten them in 15 mins. And, with PA being shall issue.....lol. Again, I wish they would come to the source instead of trying to deal through the grapevine.

I knew her mom was going flip shit, that's just the way she is, lol. But her uncle being "worried" about me having a LTCF is just astounding. It boils down to either he's scared of guns, which is dumb. Or that he feels only LEO's should carry guns, which is dumb.

That's all, for now at least. I'll have to get some papers for when the eventual discussion happens. I'll also have to print out a copy of the MPOETC, just to make sure he's up to par on OC

[mingomom]

Okay, I can see your point. They should have come to you with any questions. But to be fair, they should already have known from YOU that you carry. For pete's sake, haven't you been to their house, had a conversation or twelve, worn your gun while out with your girl?

If I were them, I'd be wondering what else we don't know about you. That isn't a very comforting thought for parents to be thinking. This is going to be your family. Be real with them.

From the beginning:

This past saturday, I was at the SGL range with my friend. I was breaking in my SuperTuck (which is awesome, btw), and was shooting my BCM. Needless to say, it was hot, and as we were packing things into the car, I decided to take off my cover shirt. No big deal. My friend noticed a guy was staring us down. As I was pulling out of my parking spot, he walked out away from his car, totally getting a look at my plates. We both were like, "wtf is that guy all about? probably a bored off duty cop who doesn't know the law". So I just waved out the window at him while I drove off. That was that, nothing came of it.

Until the other day, when my fiance told me that I ignored her uncle at the range. I was like, "What, I didn't see your uncle at all!" and she was like, "Yeah, he was there with his son, and you just ignored him".

It hit me like a slap in the face. The "off duty cop" was her uncle, who is a probation officer. I laughed my ass off. I didn't recognize him one bit, so of course I ignored some weirdo just staring at me, and getting my plate numbers. He wasn't trying to say hi or wave or anything, just stared me down.

Well, I was talking to my lady today, and apparently her uncle was so very concerned that I had a "permit" that he called her mom to complain about it. Funny how Italian families work (no offense intended to anyone ). So her mom was all like, "Why does he need a permit?! You know how difficult it is to get one? You need very specific reasons to do so."

blah blah BAAAAA. Lol. I really wish they would have just come to me about the whole thing. That way I could set them all straight!

For the record, her uncle sometimes OC's around her grandma's house, which is right next door to her mom's house. He doesn't expect anyone to mind him doing that. I feel he thinks that us "ordinary people" shouldn't carry guns, but I have no idea, because I wasn't there when he made the comment to my lady.

We all know how easy it is to get a LTCF. I got mine in 3 days, lol, and I know others have gotten them in 15 mins. And, with PA being shall issue.....lol. Again, I wish they would come to the source instead of trying to deal through the grapevine.

I knew her mom was going flip shit, that's just the way she is, lol. But her uncle being "worried" about me having a LTCF is just astounding. It boils down to either he's scared of guns, which is dumb. Or that he feels only LEO's should carry guns, which is dumb.

That's all, for now at least. I'll have to get some papers for when the eventual discussion happens. I'll also have to print out a copy of the MPOETC, just to make sure he's up to par on OC

[cigarmanpa]

Okay, I can see your point. They should have come to you with any questions. But to be fair, they should already have known from YOU that you carry. For pete's sake, haven't you been to their house, had a conversation or twelve, worn your gun while out with your girl?

If I were them, I'd be wondering what else we don't know about you. That isn't a very comforting thought for parents to be thinking. This is going to be your family. Be real with them.

my family doesn't know that I carry, no not family I married into, my born into family.

[ddefazio]

Okay, I can see your point. They should have come to you with any questions. But to be fair, they should already have known from YOU that you carry. For pete's sake, haven't you been to their house, had a conversation or twelve, worn your gun while out with your girl?

If I were them, I'd be wondering what else we don't know about you. That isn't a very comforting thought for parents to be thinking. This is going to be your family. Be real with them.

I don't see where it was his duty to tell her parents every little detail about him and that he CC his firearm. If his Fiance knows that he carries and she is comfortable with it then that is all that matters.

[blankexistance]

I specifically didn't tell them because it's none of their business that I carry. My fiance knows I carry, and she's fine with it. She's the only one that really needs to know in my book.

That being said, there isn't much they don't know about me. First time I met her mom, 4 years ago, I sat down and talked to just her mom, while my lady was in the other room. Talk about the 3rd degree. But I didn't mind at all, and answered all her questions truthfully and with a smile.

They already knew I had guns. They never asked me about them. I would have gladly and honestly answered their questions, if they had asked. But they never did, so why even stir that pot? If it isn't broke, don't fix it.

It's the same reason I didn't tell them I was planning on getting a new tattoo. They found out after the fact. Do I need their permission to exercise my own rights?

If I were them, I'd be wondering what else we don't know about you.

Glad to know you are so quick to judge, and paint people's names in a bad light, with so little experience of that person.

[Emptymag]

From the beginning:

This past saturday, I was at the SGL range with my friend. I was breaking in my SuperTuck (which is awesome, btw), and was shooting my BCM. Needless to say, it was hot, and as we were packing things into the car, I decided to take off my cover shirt. No big deal. My friend noticed a guy was staring us down. As I was pulling out of my parking spot, he walked out away from his car, totally getting a look at my plates. We both were like, "wtf is that guy all about? probably a bored off duty cop who doesn't know the law". So I just waved out the window at him while I drove off. That was that, nothing came of it.

Until the other day, when my fiance told me that I ignored her uncle at the range. I was like, "What, I didn't see your uncle at all!" and she was like, "Yeah, he was there with his son, and you just ignored him".

It hit me like a slap in the face. The "off duty cop" was her uncle, who is a probation officer. I laughed my ass off. I didn't recognize him one bit, so of course I ignored some weirdo just staring at me, and getting my plate numbers. He wasn't trying to say hi or wave or anything, just stared me down.

Well, I was talking to my lady today, and apparently her uncle was so very concerned that I had a "permit" that he called her mom to complain about it. Funny how Italian families work (no offense intended to anyone ). So her mom was all like, "Why does he need a permit?! You know how difficult it is to get one? You need very specific reasons to do so."

blah blah BAAAAA. Lol. I really wish they would have just come to me about the whole thing. That way I could set them all straight!

For the record, her uncle sometimes OC's around her grandma's house, which is right next door to her mom's house. He doesn't expect anyone to mind him doing that. I feel he thinks that us "ordinary people" shouldn't carry guns, but I have no idea, because I wasn't there when he made the comment to my lady.

We all know how easy it is to get a LTCF. I got mine in 3 days, lol, and I know others have gotten them in 15 mins. And, with PA being shall issue.....lol. Again, I wish they would come to the source instead of trying to deal through the grapevine.

I knew her mom was going flip shit, that's just the way she is, lol. But her uncle being "worried" about me having a LTCF is just astounding. It boils down to either he's scared of guns, which is dumb. Or that he feels only LEO's should carry guns, which is dumb.

That's all, for now at least. I'll have to get some papers for when the eventual discussion happens. I'll also have to print out a copy of the MPOETC, just to make sure he's up to par on OC

Or it could boil down to he doesn't think you're responsible enough to carry a gun. There are many more possibilities than the two that you mentioned. That's where communication comes into play.



Also, I have to think that if one is keeping gun ownership/carry a "secret" from family, there are bigger issues than the reaction when they "find out".
Just a generalized statement, after having heard so many people on the forum talk about their "secret".

[mingomom]

I don't see where it was his duty to tell her parents every little detail about him and that he CC his firearm. If his Fiance knows that he carries and she is comfortable with it then that is all that matters.

I don't think he needs to tell her parents every little detail. Personal things are personal. But things that are done in public will be found out (as he discovered). I think it's disingenuous of him to be flabbergasted that they didn't "come to him" when he has deliberately (from what I can tell) kept this information from them.

[headcase]

Okay, I can see your point. They should have come to you with any questions. But to be fair, they should already have known from YOU that you carry. For pete's sake, haven't you been to their house, had a conversation or twelve, worn your gun while out with your girl?

If I were them, I'd be wondering what else we don't know about you. That isn't a very comforting thought for parents to be thinking. This is going to be your family. Be real with them.

There is a reason why there is a stereotype about inlaws...


I think the OP seems to be doing a fine job of showing respect and asserting his independence. Keep it up. When you see the uncle, make sure you are the first to ask why he didn't say anything to you.

[blankexistance]

Or it could boil down to he doesn't think you're responsible enough to carry a gun. There are many more possibilities than the two that you mentioned. That's where communication comes into play.

Also, I have to think that if one is keeping gun ownership/carry a "secret" from family, there are bigger issues than the reaction when they "find out".
Just a generalized statement, after having heard so many people on the forum talk about their "secret".

True, but this site taught me never to talk to cops! Catch 22!

Not really keeping it a secret, as I said above, I just never saw the need to notify them that I carry. They know I have guns, and that I take her shooting. I don't feel as if I should tell them every aspect of my life. But now, since they know, they are going to get an earful when they do ask me about it.

[cigarmanpa]

I don't think he needs to tell her parents every little detail. Personal things are personal. But things that are done in public will be found out (as he discovered). I think it's disingenuous of him to be flabbergasted that they didn't "come to him" when he has deliberately (from what I can tell) kept this information from them.

what business is of theirs? Should he ask them what car to buy when he gets a new one? Only two people have to know about him carrying, his wife to be and him.