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Thread: Funny and true
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March 23rd, 2007, 10:43 AM #1
Funny and true
I don't know if some of you have read this before or not, and I apologize if this has been posted before; however, this struck me as funny and true (see title of post). I apologize that this is a little long.
A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I ell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will
you give me a calf?"
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and
says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the
cowboy.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says the cowboy.
Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd of sheep.
Now give me back my dog.When the government has a knife at your throat and a hand on your wallet, it matters not whether it is the left or the right hand.
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March 23rd, 2007, 10:55 AM #2
Re: Funny and true
Thanks!
Nothing like a little humor on a miserable, rainy morning.
I called to check my ZIP CODE!....DY-NO-MITE!!!
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March 23rd, 2007, 11:24 AM #3
Re: Funny and true
I love it!
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March 23rd, 2007, 11:30 AM #4
Re: Funny and true
I've seen it before, but it still is funny,
except that it's so true of politicians and governmnet
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March 23rd, 2007, 11:46 AM #5
Re: Funny and true
Hehe, I like that one.
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March 23rd, 2007, 12:46 PM #6
Re: Funny and true
hahha.. thats great!
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“If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquillity of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, — go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen!”
~Samuel Adams
"I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it."
~Thomas Jefferson, 1791
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