How Can I Help A Kid?

[Smalls]

Short story long, My Girlfriend (of 3.5 years) recently had some family tragedy on her side.

Her sister, who has a son that is around 13 years old, was dating a girl (shes Bi/Doesn't know yet) Well they ended a long relationship and the other person comitted suicide this past weekend. None of them (Sister or Son) were present, but obviously the girl played a part in this kids growing up.

He has always looked up to me for some reason and I felt the need to put myself out there and try to help with whatever I can. I told her I could take him for a day and talk to him (I guess since were somewhat close in age, Im 22) that I may be able to show him is wasn't his fault and pretty much try to help with the questions that a 13y year old would have.

I figured on taking a cool drive through the mountains. I have a lifted jeep and he enjoys that kind of stuff. But I'm looking to help him. It's seems his family are just trying to hide the fact what really happened. He knows but isn't sure why. He is seeking professional counseling.

But I know he should be spared the gruesome details, I think however, that he needs to be "educated" on the matter. I know I'm not educated in the psych. field but I also don't agree with sheltering him.

The family accepts me as one of their own. I plan on marrying this girl. But should I go with my gut or say what the family wants me to say?

[Strapped]

Tough call bro... Handle it the best you know how, but I'd let him lead the talk...

[redeye202]

Tough call bro... Handle it the best you know how, but I'd let him lead the talk...

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[ScaredOnce]

Tough call bro... Handle it the best you know how, but I'd let him lead the talk...

Yeah. It's a tough thing to deal with. Unfortunately, I've been in your exact situation - though the kid was a girl. It's tough to say the right thing and not patronize. Remember, he'll likely remember every single thing you say about the situation. So, let him lead the talk.

Smalls, you're doing a good thing... Best of luck.

[MrsMtnJack]

The main thing is he is getting professional help.



I suggest a hike. Be there.

[GuyMontag]

I think you've already gotten some great advice.

Definitely professional help.
If you chat, let him lead and do the talking. It may even pay for you (or whoever he opens up to) to get professional help as well just to understand how to talk to him.
He's going to need a lot of love and shoulders to lean on. Just listening is probably the best therapy you can give.

[Smalls]

I think you've already gotten some great advice.

Definitely professional help.
If you chat, let him lead and do the talking. It may even pay for you (or whoever he opens up to) to get professional help as well just to understand how to talk to him.
He's going to need a lot of love and shoulders to lean on. Just listening is probably the best therapy you can give.

Thanks everyone for your insight. It's greatly apperciated.

He is already/in the process of getting professional help. I guess I'm just playing the role of "bigger brother" here. I guess we will see how it plays out on Thursday.

Thank you all.