Medical Marijuana

[jahwarrior72]

All great replies and suggestions.

She does have the ultimate family support.

But, how to you tell your kids what not to believe in school? Aren't they supposed to obey and learn? What happens when they become inquisitive or rebellious, defying authority? Then you become saddled with a child with a behavior problem that the school created. The school system doesn't have the "time" to be sensitive to a select few.

Wouldn't this create mass confusion?

i make sure my kids understand, that teachers and schools aren't right on everything. this cause some fights between me and the missus ("don't tell them that columbus was a slave trader and a murderer!"), but it's important that they know that no one is infallible, and just because a grownup tells you something, doesn't mean it's true.

of course, this backfires occasionally, and my kids are always calling me on bullshit. but, it keeps them thinking. i also tell them, that although you should respect grownups, they have to respect you in return. you should never let them make you feel small or stupid. respect is earned, not given.

[stinkymcdoober]

I have to agree with warrior on this one, Michele. There is a very fine balance between telling your kids that not all grownups are right, without turning them into rebels as you say.

We try to tell our daughter, whenever the opportunity arises, that not all grownups are as good or correct as they should be, and she should question anything that doesn't sit right with her. Give them good instincts and then tell them to trust them sorta thing. We've always made every effort to get her to respect adults, and along with that question them respectfully. ALWAYS ask questions. Personally, i think that's the base of it all. If they always ask questions, the brains always working, and by that time hopefully the balls rolling in the right direction.

[Michele]

I've always encouraged my son to ask me questions.
I tried to explain to my son (when he was small) that everyone runs their house differently. What goes in my house may not necessarily go in someone else's house and vice versa. I also drilled into my sons head that what goes on in his house, stays in his house. Its nobody's business but ours. Thank goodness my son was savvy and picked up on when he was being quizzed about personal matters.

When he came home and said "Ma, Mrs. Smith said blah, blah, blah, is this right"? He would question it because it was different in his house. I had to explain to him that what Mrs. Smith said was correct, however, we do it differently or say it differently. It was tough explaining "gray".

What is even tougher is having to tell your kid that the teacher is dead wrong. Now that creates disharmony in the classroom. Sometimes teachers put a little too much of their personal beliefs into the classroom.

[stinkymcdoober]

I've always encouraged my son to ask me questions.
I tried to explain to my son (when he was small) that everyone runs their house differently. What goes in my house may not necessarily go in someone else's house and vice versa. I also drilled into my sons head that what goes on in his house, stays in his house. Its nobody's business but ours. Thank goodness my son was savvy and picked up on when he was being quizzed about personal matters.

When he came home and said "Ma, Mrs. Smith said blah, blah, blah, is this right"? He would question it because it was different in his house. I had to explain to him that what Mrs. Smith said was correct, however, we do it differently or say it differently. It was tough explaining "gray".

What is even tougher is having to tell your kid that the teacher is dead wrong. Now that creates disharmony in the classroom. Sometimes teachers put a little too much of their personal beliefs into the classroom.

That is really tough. We've run into that sort of similar situation in our home with her biological mother's family. She would come to us and say "Nana said this and that, is that true?". It's hard to tell her that her own family is dead wrong, while at the same time "keeping it positive" and reminding her her family still loves her etc. etc. etc.

I think teachers have it tough though, you spend so much time with kids, and unfortunately so many of them don't have parents that care or are involved like many of us here, and it's really difficult to keep that line (though that is their job to do so). I believe the bottom line, however, is that it's YOUR kid to raise and educate how YOU feel is best. A teacher is just a supplement to a child's overall upbringing.

[knighthawk06699]

That is really tough. We've run into that sort of similar situation in our home with her biological mother's family. She would come to us and say "Nana said this and that, is that true?". It's hard to tell her that her own family is dead wrong, while at the same time "keeping it positive" and reminding her her family still loves her etc. etc. etc.

I think teachers have it tough though, you spend so much time with kids, and unfortunately so many of them don't have parents that care or are involved like many of us here, and it's really difficult to keep that line (though that is their job to do so). I believe the bottom line, however, is that it's YOUR kid to raise and educate how YOU feel is best. A teacher is just a supplement to a child's overall upbringing.

Bravo child rearing starts and ends in the home. Your child's teacher should not be allowed to manipulate what you teach your child. When in fact it should be just the opposite, you as a parent should be manipulating what your child's teacher teaches your child.

Medicine is medicine no matter what form it comes in. Wether you smoke it swallow it, or shoot it (insulin). The fact of the matter is the school system needs to stay the hell out of my home. I don't come into your classroom and tell you how to run your class, don't you dare tell me how to raise my child.

The only exception to this if it is an obvious case of child neglect/abuse.

[Atomic Dog]

A person very close to me also uses marijuana to for medical reasons. It is a shame that this person could be thrown in jail for using medicine that actually works as opposed to the prescription stuff that makes her worse.


D.A.R.E. is a broken program and instills dangerous principles that undermine society. Tell them that the teacher is full of shit!

[knighthawk06699]

D.A.R.E. is a broken program and instills dangerous principles that undermine society. Tell them that the teacher is full of shit!

It is another one of those programs that looks great, and that is about as far as it goes.

[Koli01]

Not to make light of a serious subject but,

Maybe she could explain that she is a democrat and can do as she pleases while others are republicans and therefore restricted by laws.

[Dredly]

I think she would be best served by pointing out the cause and effect of actions as well as the duality of the law that is built to "protect" however it often harms.

Some great examples that she could use that will really make it clear to the kids would be stuff like:

- You are old enough to fight and die for your country, you are mature enough and wise enough to help select who runs the country, but if you have a sip of beer you are breaking the law.

- Some states allow you to drive at 15 with a permit and get your license at 16, others won't allow a permit till 16 and you can take your test weeks later, others require it be a full year before you can have your license...

- Gun control laws (self explanatory)


By exposing the double talk for what it really is she will be able to also demonstrate how there is a legal use and an illegal use for different items. What she is doing is using an item legally, what others are doing is illegal.

[Carnes]

How to handle this depends largely on the age, disposition and maturity of the children.

If the teen in HS is self-destructive, angry and frequently hostile adding something as controversial as medical marijuana to the dynamic could create a devastating situation.

With the really young ones, you cannot be too careful. They may not even realize they are implicating their mother. Imagine this, "Mommy is sick, but her medicine makes her feel better. I think it's stinky, but she says she needs it." Then the teacher asks, stinky? what kind of medicine? "Oh, she smokes it, we had a talk, and I'm not supposed to tell anyone."

On the other hand, if the kids are mature and supportive, regardless of age, they can be very helpful with this kind of situation, especially if she uses the oldest one to help decide when and how to bring the younger ones into the fold.

As far as telling them about how teachers can sometimes be wrong, you may want to try to start with something more benign than Medical Marijuana, a constitution class may be a good place to start.

Depending on the situation, homeschooling may be a good solution, but that certainly would be a big change, and given medical conditions, may not be the best idea.

I definitely agree that when one or more of the children is confronted with this issue, it be done with other family members, or if the child is somewhat hostile to the parent, but has a favorite aunt it may be a good idea to have that aunt initiate the discussion.

I would encourage that something be done soon, particularly concerning the kid in HS. But in the mean time stick with the old phrase, "concealed means concealed." That stuff has to be put away, away. If she has been stashing it in the old sock drawer, all the kids already know what is going on. (The OP did not clearly indicate if the kids were aware of the usage or not.)

If the kids are aware of the usage, something needs to be done immediately... there are too many bad things that can spring up. If the family is really tight, she may even want to consider leaving the kids with a family member until everyone is certain that they are all on the same sheet of music. That would certainly be a hard challenge, but with this kind of situation, she has the potential to loose the kids permanently if things go haywire.

I really hope for the best in this situation. In the meantime, DrugPolicy.Org and the National Organization to Reform Marijuana Law, NORML.org are two excellent resources where you will be able to find help and support.

Best wishes.