New Element Discovered - Governmentium

**LorDiego01** · December 11th, 2006, 03:29 PM

A major research institution (MRI) has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element has been tentatively named Governmentium. Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Governmentium has a normal half-life of three years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.

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This is so great, I had to post it.

**jdlv4_0** · December 11th, 2006, 03:32 PM

I LOVE IT!!!!

**ChamberedRound** · December 11th, 2006, 03:43 PM

LOL! Brilliant. Just brilliant. Another fine post by Diego

**billamj** · December 11th, 2006, 04:08 PM

That is just outstanding! You can't see it, but I'm giving you a standing ovation for that.

**LorDiego01** · December 11th, 2006, 04:40 PM

Thanks!

Glad you guys like it.

Forgot to add the link where I got this from!

http://www.dullmen.com/governmentium.htm

**SGTUSArmy** · December 11th, 2006, 05:43 PM

That is awesome, and I needed it after the day I had. Too bad I am probably a part of governmentium.

**jdlv4_0** · December 11th, 2006, 05:50 PM

Originally Posted by SGTUSArmy

That is awesome, and I needed it after the day I had. Too bad I am probably a part of governmentium.

Don't worry E5 and below is exempt from the stupidity of the O's

**SGTUSArmy** · December 11th, 2006, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by jdlv4_0

Don't worry E5 and below is exempt from the stupidity of the O's

Oh dang..That means I shouldn't ever get promoted again? Dang...there goes my hope of one day being able to afford an actual new (non-used by anyone else ever) truck. And to think, I was actually wanting to take some advice I was given one time by SMA Tilley, who quoted Colin Powell. if you see an issue, dont' just complain, get yourself into a position to change it. (it's paraphrased of course, my mind is kind of like some of you old-timers, a bit rusty at times.)