MILITARY FRIENDS -VS- CIVILIAN FRIENDS

[billamj]

Damn but doesn't that bring back memories. Too bad so very many folks will never understand the meaning behind it.

[Montanya]

I have never been in the military but I am certainly a qualified "Military Friend" as I have and do the majority of those.

[theshadow]

Damn but doesn't that bring back memories. Too bad so very many folks will never understand the meaning behind it.

Yea, this danged thread has me thinking back to the ROK, remembering things like JSA, Injae, the hills at the Repo Depo, Riot Season and never forget Turtle Traps.

[Ten*K]

lol... Korea.... Waffle Girls.

[craigc]

Some of my favs
I'm sure most of you have already seen these...but sometimes it's worth seeing again!!!

You Know You're Airborne If:

*You think handing a bag of puke to the guy responsible for getting you out of the aircraft safely is funny.

*Your kids make their friends do 10 pull-ups before they enter or exit the backyard.

*You can haggle a pound cake from a leg for some M&Ms and Crackers

*You go to your bathroom/latrine for a "Class 1 download"

*You have a certificate of your kids birth and it states they have completed one successful static line jump.

*You know how much room there is left in a C-130...room for one more jumper.

*You do a clear to the rear out your back door to check for any obstructions

*You claim tips at the strip bar on your income taxes.

*Prior to your kids entering the bathtub you give them STAND BY.

*You ever jumped hung over.

*You have sent a private to get the keys to area J.

*You have a "Swing Landing Apparatus" in your backyard.

*Your kid has ever told you to hurry up, because "you're moving like pond water!"

*You have walked through an airport with a duffle bag on your back and a backpack on your chest.

*You have ever jettisoned your ruck and still beat it to the ground.

*All of your civilian shirts have Airborne or Special Ops logos on them.

*You rate a potential girlfriend as a "good jump" or a "no-jump".

*You know what a woobie is, and you'll fight for one!

*Your little boy can say "Airborne", "Heavy Drop", and "Hooah" all before the age of two!!!

*You issue a proper 5 point contingency plan to your family prior to entering the mall, and hold brief-backs.


*You slap your thigh two times and use an open hand to point things out to others, such as: "It's over there, by the - SLAP, SLAP - water cooler."

*You have sent a private to ask the 1SG when the next flame thrower range is.

*You have ever had a conversation entirely of 'Hooahs'

*While you deliver the mail, you're judging the gusts of wind as "do-able", or race-tracks.

*You avoid going home the same way you went to work.

*You've woken your son up with a chemlight on more than one occasion.

*You wrap 100mph tape on your wedding ring to make fit better.

*You have ever sung the Jeopardy theme song (twice) between reference points to make sure you're on target.

*You know the world is 75% water, and the rest is drop zone.

*Your living room curtains came from the Rigger shed.

*When your dog digs in the yard, he uses bones for sector stakes.

*You spend your last five dollars on dip instead of gas because you figure you can always ruck it to work!!

*You say "Get your brain housing unit out of your forth point of contact"

*You answer True/False questionnaires with "Clear!" and "Not Clear!"

*You named your dog sarge or St. Michael.

*You have a reserve pull ring hanging from your rearview mirror.

*You have ever thrown up intentionally to make room for more beer.

*Someone has bent over in front of you and you have the urge slap their butt and say "all ok"

*Your favorite boots are slung over a power line.

**You have a tattoo that says "Better to Burn in Than to Fade away"

*When the trooper that pulls you over for drunk driving turns his back on you, you disarm him...just to teach him to be more careful.

*You know a stand up landing IS possible with a T10.

*You know what 4 in the hand and 2 below means.

*You know how to make a poncho parachute.

*You see your wife in a sexy silk nighty, you instinctually try to check canopy and gain canopy control.

*Your kid gets ready for school and it's time to put on his backpack, you tell him to "RIG UP" and then you JMPI him.

*Your children can identify more AF cargo aircraft in the air than cars or trucks on the road.

*You know how high a HUMVEE bounces.

*You have ever sat on the shuttle bus at the airport with a backpack on.

*You had all 12 of the MRE menus memorized.

*You know why the 34ft tower is 34ft.

*You wake up your toddler from her nap and tell her to quit shamming.

*You've cussed someone out at 800' AGL..ie,"slip away you F’n SOB!!"

**Your kids point to anyone who is in uniform without wings and say "Look Daddy it's a Leg!"

*You walk into a building you take a couple of steps inside before you take off your beret to let everyone know who you are.

*Your kids open their lunch at school...and see Chicken ala King.

*You've shared a dixie cup with 60 other guys!!

*You do the Airborne Shuffle while closing your shower curtain.

*You have never landed in an airplane.

**You can honestly say, "I came from up there to kick ASS down here..."

A friend is following you in his car and you designate in route rally points.

*You have ever sent a Cherry to supply for Chemlite Batteries.

*You have ever run for the latrine with a jumper standing by.

*You remember when the Army had things called "Zero Week" and "Blood Wings".

**Your totally unimpressed by the 2500 sky dive jumps some guy at work has.

*You know what a HMMWV/Jeep looks like after it has burned in.

**Your squad has assigned seats in the front row of Rick's!

*You have a duty roster posted in the hallway of your house.

*If you have a natural aversion to wearing bright, non-tactical colors.

**Your in-flight meal is a snicker bar and beef jerky.

*Instead of a couch, you have fold-up C-130 cargo seats on your wall.

**You either shake your head in disgust or giggle when you see legs wearing a beret.

*You try to think of ways to hook up a single point release to your flak vest.

*You call your burps Infantry mating calls.

[craigc]

Your wife's two favorite shades of lipstick are light green and loam.

You go to a barbecue and insist that your family feed in a tactical chow line at five meter intervals

Before you hit the road on vacation you conduct rehearsals, back briefs, PCI, and cover your convoy checklist.

Your children clear their hand receipt and housing before they go to college.

Your wife has more jumps than most LTs in the company.

Your kids call the yard their MWR area.

You require your mechanic to replace the sandbags in your floorboard as a part of a tune-up.

Your station wagon is equipped with blackout lights, OVE, OVM, and has to be properly dispatched.

Your kids call their mother "Household 6."

Your kids volunteer to pull air guard on the school bus.

Your doorbell sounds off with the current challenge and password.

Your house has sector sketches posted by every window.

You give the command "Fix Bayonets" at Thanksgiving Dinner.

Your kids show their meal cards at the kitchen door, except the oldest, who is on separate rations.

You make your daughter sign out on pass on Prom Night.

Your kindergartner calls recess "smoke break."

Your wife calls foreplay "prepping the objective."

Your wife conducts an AAR after sex.

Your wife "takes a knee" in the checkout line at the Food Lion.

You do your "back to school" shopping at the U.S. Cavalry store.

Your kids call the tooth fairy "Slicky Boy."

Your son fails the third grade but tells everyone he was a "phase three recycle."

Your kids salute their grandparents.

Your wife's "high-n-tight" is more squared away than your commander's.

Your grandmother won "All American Week" and "Best Ranger."

All your kids have names that start with AR, FM, TM, or DA Form.

Your pick-up has your name stenciled on the windshield.

Your kids are hand-receipt holders.

Your older kids call the youngest one "Cherry."

Your kids recite their ABCs phonetically.

Your wife keeps Mermites in the China cabinet.

You call your in-laws the "Slice Elements."

All your possessions are military issue.

Your kids call their sandbox "NTC or CMTC"

You have pull-up bars outside the kitchen door.

Your daughter's first haircut was a flattop.

Your kids pull fireguard.

The only channels you get are CNN, and ESPN.

Your wife has mermites in the China Cabinet.

When your wife left you, you had a Change of Command.

Your wife carries a fannypack instead of a Gucci purse.

When your family gets together, you call them "Slice Elements".

You butter your toast with a bayonet.

Your kids get a wrong answer in school and immediately drop and knock out 20.

Your personal license plate says "At Ease".

All your kids names begin with "AR".

Your grandmother won the Week of the Eagles.

Your POV has your name stenciled on the windshield.

Anyone using the TV remote control must dispatch it first.

Your kids are hand receipt holders.

Your kids practice Drill and Ceremony at recess.

Your dogs name is "Ranger".

Your kids pull night guard in shifts by the mailbox.

Your wife has a better high and tight than your commander.

Your kids sound off with "Airborne" or "Air Assault" every time their left foot hits the ground.

Your wife won't buy anything unless it has a National Stock Number.

Your kids have to wax and buff the floor before going to school.

When your dog died, it got a 21-gun salute at Arlington.

Your kids call their teachers "REMF" and the other kids at school "legs".

Your daughter's dolls wear starched uniforms.

Your daughter complained that her new Barbie's hair wasn't within regulation and cut it.

If your kids fail a test, they get a Letter of Reprimand and an Article 15.

Your kids salute their grandparents.

Your kids get an LES with their allowance.

All your meals at home are MREs.

Your kids painted the Big Wheels camouflage and stuck bumper numbers on them.

All your household possessions were issued by CIF.

Your kids get sent to the "big house" in Leavenworth if they're disrespectful.

Your kids complain if they can't have gym class five days a week.

Everyone does six pullups before sitting down at the dinner table.

When the trooper that pulls you over for drunk driving turns his back on you, you disarm him...just to teach him to be more careful.

Your newborn's first words are "All OK, Jumpmaster".

[larrymeyer]

craigc;

Sent these along to my grandson in the 101st hope you don't mind

[craigc]

Not a Problem hope he enjoys them and thank him for his service for us