Re: .38+p vs 9mm
You can drive a 110 gr. bullet out of a snubbie .38 revolver at about 1200 fps, tops.
You can drive a 115 gr. bullet out of a snubbie 9mm auto at about 1250 fps, tops.
I don't know anyone who can tell the difference between 5 grains, 50 fps, and .002" in diameter.
Carry whichever you can shoot better (assuming equal reliability), practice as much as you can, and don't worry about caliber or stopping power. All handguns stink, and the 9mm and .38 are practically identical in terms of exterior ballistics.
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